A Bird's Eye View of Murder (Paperback)

The Baking Channel's newly appointed Blue-Ribbon Queen, Elvira Jenkins, lay face down alongside the kitchen island, her arms outstretched as if she had caught her toes under the long rubber spill mat and flapped wildly to catch her balance before going down. It was possible she had fainted, or maybe she had a severe case of narcolepsy and had fallen asleep in the middle of the most exciting night of her life. Neither optimistic scenario explained the large, bloody spot on the back of her iron-gray head of curls.

On this same kitchen set a mere hour ago, Elvira's forceful personality had loomed large with the confidence of one who could always turn others around to her way of thinking, whether they liked it or not. Now, she seemed insignificant—her thick, strong arms flaccid and pale, her bulky shoulders no longer firmly set. It was almost as if someone masquerading as the woman had taken off an Elvira Jenkins costume and tossed it carelessly aside.

Since I was sprawled out on the floor right next to her, I had a good view of her formerly penetrating gray eyes that now stared without seeing. And the dried spot of drool at the corner of her mouth.

The lingering smells of cookies and burnt cornbread wafted in the air, olfactory leftovers from the taping of the Baking Channel's newest show, Blue-Ribbon Babes, and there was a dusting of flour on the floor beneath her

"Meow! Meow! M-e-o-w!" A large bird shrieked from inside a cage tucked into a corner of the countertop, white feathers fluttering madly as if it were trying to take off in flight and leave behind the horrible scene below.

"I think I'm going to be sick," I said. And then I was.